Top reasons to move to New Zealand or move New Zealand to you

Posted by BurgerFuel

Hello America,

We were watching you last week from the future and although we're not quite sure why you didn't vote for Frank Underwood we don't think you need to panic either. We just got here to the land of the free and the home of the brave and well, we kinda like it here. In fact, we want to move New Zealand to you by bringing BurgerFuel to the mighty USA.

Yep, New Zealand’s original gourmet burger is coming in hot to the States and we’re on the hunt for a Restaurant Manager with mega-extra-factor to help us take Indianapolis by storm. If you get the job, you’ll spend three months down in New Zealand, going through our ruthless-yet-awesome training programme, before you take New Zealand back home to Indiana. It’s kind of like moving to NZ, without the visa issues, or having to convince someone from Tinder to marry you so you can get your foot in the door. Find out more here.

Coincidentally, we heard that "move to New Zealand" surged up the Google charts last night and now that some of us need to sell our houses since we moved to Indiana, here are our top reasons to move to New Zealand or (if you take the job) move New Zealand to you...

1. New Zealand is more exclusive than Canada

Think of us as the private VIP member's only club and super exclusive bar in the "interesting" part of town, but for your life. Besides, surely no American wants to give Canada the satisfaction of them thinking they are better. 

2. The walking dead can't swim to New Zealand

There is no sweeter slumber than that which comes from the knowledge that during a zombie apocalypse we could not be further away from everyone else. We're already quarantined, heck even our 2 main islands - North & South (conveniently named) are kept apart to avoid contagion. Why build walls when you have oceans?  

3. It doesn't matter if you can't spell or tupelo

Tupelo may have no relevance since it just came up in auto-correct, but made for an interesting heading. Speaking of spell checking - we speak English, but spell everything different, so every time someone calls you up on a mistake, you can just pull the "oh, sorry I was spelling it the American way". Hell, we know we are going to milk that excuse to death while we're in the US. 

4. Beach. Forest. Mountain. Worms

You're Instagram feed has never looked so good, you will be Jenner famous in no time. Let's be honest, if you saw a movie and it had beautiful scenery in it, that scenery was from New Zealand. If it wasn't, that country was probably just copying us anyway. Narnia, Middle Earth, King Kong even the Last Samurai, all that shit is here in our backyard. 

*insert New Zealand nature porn such as shots of beach, forest, mountains and glow worm caves*

5. BurgerFuel. Home of New Zealand's Original Gourmet Burger

Last, but not least, we are home to BurgerFuel. Self-proclaimed and unexplained inventor of the gourmet burger. We made it all here in humble little New Zealand and we’re briging a piece of that juicy goodness up to you in America. So, if you can't wait to get a piece or want to take a visit, we're actually looking for someone to run our store. Up for the challenge? Hit it to click it here to find out more.

P.S. We won't bore you with the scientific details, but we get to celebrate New Year's Eve first, see the sun first, we have hover boards and the only Trump(ets) we have are exclusively made of ice cream. Do with that what you will.